Chapter 32 – Bad Dream

“She came?” Trebor searched Bray’s eyes for confirmation. What was he worried about? It was his sister. His little sister. The same girl who he had protected from pirates when they had tried to make her walk the plank. 

Nodding Bray lowered himself into the chair next to Trebor’s bed. His eyes drooped making him look like he hadn’t slept in days. “She did,” he confirmed, taking Trebor’s hand in his “she wants to be accepted…”

Trebor’s eyes narrowed as the suppressed suspicions rose inside him. “Did she say that? Is it really what she wants?” This is what he’d always wanted ever since he found out she had quit college. Why was he so afraid? So … distrustful?

Bray squeezed Trebor’s hand, rubbing his thumb over the back of his hand. He could hear the doubt, the anger mixed with fear. “No,” he shook his head, wishing he could say differently. “Not in so many words at least. Does she have to? She’s your sister. Family supports each other no matter what, right?” Trebor had told him that plenty of times. He was starting to believe it. His parents had dropped everything to be with him while Trebor was missing. Despite everything he’d put them through in the past they were there for him.

Tugging his hand free, Trebor rolled onto his side, facing the wall. “I don’t know….my…Aunt…”

There it was. The root cause of the doubt. The fear. The distrust. Helpless Bray watched as tremors ran up and down Trebor’s back. Everything inside him wanted to gather Trebor in his arms and tell him everything was going to be alright. That his sister was there out of concern for him and his parents. She wouldn’t hurt them. How? When someone from inside his own family had done so much harm. For that Bray could easily see himself choking the life from that woman…if he had the chance. Clearing his throat he reached a hand out, touching Trebor’s shoulder “she’s not like that. I think … She’s wanted to come home for a while and didn’t know how.” 

“You don’t know that,” Trebor’s voice rose reminding Bray of someone waking up from a nightmare unsure of where he was or if they were safe.

Squeezing Trebor’s should “no I don’t. I wish I could be sure. I wish I could say no one will ever hurt you again but I can’t. We don’t know.” He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, smiling a little when Trebor rolled over, his eyes peering up at him. “I’ll be here. You won’t be alone.We’ll figure it out together.”

“You promise,” Trebor’s eyes peered up anxious for reassurance.

“I promise,” he ruffled Trebor’s hair. “Wait until you meet your niece. She’s a pretty little thing. Looks like your dad.”

“Lonnie had a baby,” Trebor murmured into his pillow, unable to picture his sister as a mother.

“I’m not a judge of age but I think she’s about two or three years old.” Braylin continued to describe his meeting with Lonnie and her daughter. “If I were to guess, I think she’s been afraid to come. To explain how she became a single mother. Afraid of disappointing everyone.”

“So instead she just cut us off like we didn’t even exist,” Trebor huffed. He knew he was being unfair. He hadn’t been all that understanding the last he had spoken to his sister. Getting all sanctimonious when she let it slip she had tried some recreational drugs, smoked a little weed, enjoyed drinking a little too much. The party girl who instead of going on academic probation decided it’d be better to just quit. 

Watching the conflicting emotions play across Trebor’s face, Braylin stroked a hand across his cheek, “hey this isn’t your fault. She made her own decisions.” 

Trebor shook his head, his mind conjuring up the last conversation he had with his sister. He’d called her a disappointment. He brought his hands up, covering his face as if he hoped it would block out the memories of his harsh words. “It’s my fault. If I had tried to understand. I should have been a better brother….” A sob tore through his chest “if I hadn’t been so judgemental maybe she’d have come home. Asked for help.”

“Don’t…” Bray started to say as he gathered Trebor into his arms, rocking him back and forth. He didn’t finish his thought. There wasn’t much he could say that wasn’t cliche or could make him feel better. 

***

“No,” Trebor murmured, kicking the blankets from on top of him. His legs tangled in their folds. “No,” he whimpered as a shadowy figure approached him. A stray glint of light shone on pointy, fake nails elongated by the shadows that distorted everything around him. “No. Please,” he cried head tossing back and forth on the pillow, hair matted on his feverish brow.

“No,” he shouted, bolting upright in his bed. The light streaming through the mostly closed shades cast strange and eerie shadows on the floor and walls. “Where?” his voice was hoarse like he’d been talking for a long time or yelling. He rubbed a hand across his face. Another nightmare. She was still out there. Lurking in the dark. Waiting for her chance to pounce.

His eyes fell on a worried little face who had long hair the same color as his dad’s. His thoughts turned to the last time he’d seen him, running towards him, shouting. Reaching Braylin as the moment a bang shattered the air around them. If he’d been a little slower, a fraction of a second later and it would have been Braylin fighting for his life. “Who?” he croaked at the little girl staring up at him.

Marcy put a hand out, patting his “I dream of the bad man too.”

Her words sent a shiver of shock down his spine. His fingers clutched at the blanket, pulling up around his shoulders “bad man?” he asked. 

Nodding she leaned in close as if afraid someone would overhear what she had to say. “The bad man tooked me away.” Tears shimmered in her eyes “I wanted mommy but they wouldn’t let me go home.”

“Me too,” he murmured once again that little two year old boy cowering in the corner, calling for his mommy and daddy and wondering why they didn’t come. The memories felt like a weight upon his chest, crushing the air from his lungs, squeezing, hurting. 

“Did the bad man tooked you?” she leaned her chin on the bed, peering up at him.

“Bad woman,” he confided in her, a bond neither of them deserved or wanted. He reached a hand out, stroking the top of her head, it shook but she didn’t seem to mind. He wanted to wrap her up somewhere safe but he knew only too well the nightmares found you anywhere even in the arms of the one you trusted most. You weren’t safe anywhere.

“I’m sorry,” he leaned across the bed, giving the top of her head a kiss. 

The door to his room swung open, a silhouette of a woman appeared talking over her shoulder “found her.” Stepping inside the room, the door slowly closing behind her.

Instinctively Trebor tried to shield the little girl, throwing his arms around her. His heart pounding inside his chest, sure that the woman was there to take them both and he couldn’t let that happen.

Flipping the light on, the woman stood with her hands on her hips staring down at the little girl. “How many times have I told you not to run off? You have to wait for mommy.”

“I’m sorry mommy,” the little girl’s bottom lip quivered as she stepped out of Trebor’s sheltering embrace. 

A smile softened the woman’s face, erasing lines of worry and stress. “Were you in a hurry to meet your uncle?” she asked, nodding towards Trebor.

Nodding Marcy took his hand “he had bad dream. Like me.”

“Lonnie?” Trebor asked frowning up at her as his eyes adjusted to the brightness of the room. “This little girl? She’s your daughter?”

“What if she is?” her tone was brittle as ice.

“”I’m so sorry you had to go through all of this alone,” he murmured, struggling to sit up. “I’m sorry I made it impossible for you to come home. To ask for help.. ”

She blinked like she couldn’t believe her ears. She had thought all she wanted was to hear her brother apologize to her. To admit he was wrong. Now she realized it wasn’t what she wanted. Not really. “I should have come home. I was stupid,” her face crumpled as she fought the sobs forcing their out. Her shoulders shook “if I hadn’t let my pride get in the way…”

“Hey,” Trebor stood from the bed, knees bowing with the effort. “Don’t cry,” he soothed.

Her hands reached for him “I’ve missed you so much.” Out of all the things she thought she’d say those words were not it. But it was true. She had missed him. More than she realized.

Pulling her close, he hugged her tight “I’ve missed you too.”

Melting into his embrace, she remembered how sofe she’d always felt near him. Like they could conquer the world as long as they were together. Why had she ever doubted him? She could feel how weak he was. The way she was holding more of his weight than he was. The bruises, though fading, are still horrific. Anger boiled to the surface. She wanted to hunt down that woman who did this to him. For the first time she understood what drove Shania into pulling the trigger. At least Marcy didn’t have to worry about her kidnapper coming back for her. 

“I hear I’m an auntie,” she grinned, helping back into bed. She saw the anguish in his eyes and she realized he had spent days mourning his son while being tortured. One way or another she was going to find that woman and end her. She knew exactly where to start. The undercover officer was in a room right here in the hospital.

Chapter 31 – The Visitor

Lonnie clutched her daughter’s hand as she walked through the formidable doors of the hospital. All she knew about the place was it was the teaching hospital where her brother was doing his residency. A part of her wanted to turn around. Leave. Pretend she never received the message. Slowing she half turned, poised to leave when a young man with light pink hair approached them, calling her name.

“You must be Lonnie,” he held his hand out in welcome “I’m Braylin.”

She stared at his hand a moment before taking it in a jerky motion, murmuring “it’s nice to meet you.” His knowing smirk told her he wasn’t buying the polite words.

“Trebor has told me so much about you,” he said, filling in the silence that fell between them as they waited for the elevator. Smiling down at the little girl clutching Lonnie’s hand “is this your little girl? Trebor never mentioned…”

“Of course not,” she snapped, pulling the girl closer to her. “Trebor doesn’t know anything about me.”

Frowning, Braylin followed her out of the elevator, shaking his head at her. He was beginning to understand why Trebor was always frustrated when he’d managed to have a couple of words with her on the phone. Prickly was just the tip of the words he’d use to describe her. But one thing he did know was “he’s missed you…”

She made a sound like a derisive snort “don’t make me laugh. All he’s ever done is criticize me and the way I choose to live my life.”

His skin prickled at her disdainful words. Reaching out he touched her arm, blocking her from entering the door into the ICU. “If you don’t want to be here, turn around and leave. Your family has been through enough. They sure as hell don’t need your attitude.”

Some emotion Bray couldn’t identify flickered in her eyes. She turned her face away “they don’t need me,” she murmured.

“Not like this, they don’t,” he confirmed. “They care about you. Trebor has only ever wanted to help you and you’ve thrown all of his suggestions back at him. You haven’t spoken to your parents for over three years. It was my idea to call you. I thought that maybe you’d want to see your dad before …” he cut himself off. He couldn’t say it. The doctor’s weren’t being optimistic on Garrett’s chances. “Look, your mother needs you. They all do.”

Staring at the cold, impersonal tile, she swiped a hand across her cheek drying a tear before it had a chance to roll down her face. “Fine I’ll stay but I,” she swallowed over the lump in her throat. Lifting her eyes she met his “I’ve made a lot of mistakes…they may not want me here.”

“We’ve all made mistakes,” he gave her an encouraging smile “I’ve made more than most and my family’s still here supporting me. I used to think that my family was better off without me. By staying away all I did was make things harder.”

“Trebor’s lucky to have you,” she surprised them both with her words. Smiling, she hastily dried her tears “I don’t know if you’re right…”

“Of course I am,” he chuckled a little before taking her by the elbow and guiding her to some chairs. “Let’s sit for a moment before seeing your mom.” Once they were settled he winked at the little girl “is this your daughter?”

Sniffing a little she nodded, running her hand down her daughter’s hair “she’s my little sunshine.” She could have added that she was also the reason why she hadn’t come home too. She knew how disappointed her parents would have been in her. Quitting college. Getting mixed up with drugs. That culminated in a one nightstand with Barrett Trevino, a rising solo singer who had spent the past few years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit. 

“Mom, can we go now,” Marcy asked, “I don’t like it here. It smells funny.”

Leaning in close to the little girl “I don’t like it here either,” Braylin said like they were sharing secrets. “Hospitals aren’t any fun. But once we’re done here I can let you hold your new baby cousin.”

“I have a cousin?” she asked, looking up at her mother, eyes wide with wonder. 

“Yes you do,” Lonnie confirmed having read about how the undercover cop had saved her brother’s baby. 

“You sure do,” Braylin patted her head “his name is Blake.”

Turning to her mom “I want to see Blake now.” 

“You will, I promise.” Standing she said as if facing the hardest thing she could imagine “first we have to see grandma.”

“I have a grandma?” Marcy asked.

“And an Uncle,” Braylin winked at her, taking her hand and walking with them towards the ICU.

***

At the sound of the door opening behind her, Verity moved to confront whoever it was disturbing her time with her husband. Her face pinched tight as if trying not to cry, it took her a moment to recognize the young woman standing in the doorway. Moaning she brought a hand to her mouth, “Lonnie” she sobbed, “how?” she stumbled forward reaching for her daughter, needing to feel, to smell to assure her eyes that she wasn’t just imagining things.

Lonnie grasped her mother’s reaching hand, pulling her close, hugging her tight. She had never seen her mother so lost, it almost scared her. Her mother had always been so strong. The family foundation. If she crumbled how would they ever be a family again?

“Mom…I’m…” she wanted to say she was sorry but the word stuck in her throat. She’d promised herself that she would never apologize for the decisions she had made or why she had cut off all ties with her family. Stepping back she asked “how is daddy?” Her eyes flicked towards the still figure on the bed. It seemed surreal to her that this was her dad. He had always seemed so strong and invincible to her.

“Oh,” Verity straightened, wiping her eyes dry on the back of her hands. Moving towards the bed where she had sat so many long hours waiting, hoping for any sign of change. Taking his hand, patting it, “he’s going to be just fine. He’s going to wake up and see you standing here and he’s going to be so happy.”

Lonnie wasn’t sure about that. If she were her parents and Marcy had ghosted her the way she had them she didn’t think she could forgive her. Sure she’d be happy to see her again but always in the back of her mind she’d wonder when she’d leave again. She listened to the machines keeping track of every life sign on the still form on the bed. Would he really be alright? Was her mom just saying what she hoped would happen? 

Blinking back tears she looked down at her daughter when she tugged on her hand wanting her attention. “What is it, Marcy?” she asked with barely restrained irritation.

“Mom,” Marcy pointed towards Verity “who is that lady?”

“That lady is your grandma,” she knelt in front of her daughter. “why don’t you go say hi to her?”

Shaking her head suddenly shy, “no,” she buried her head on her mom’s shoulder.

“Don’t worry I’ll be right here the whole time,” Lonnie promised.

Marcy gave her an uncertain look before she took a step towards Verity. “Are you really my Grandma?”

Looking down at the little girl Verity looked over at her daughter unsure what she should say. “Is this your mom?” she asked instead, feeling her way through this maze she found herself in.

Nodding Marcy took another step closer “my mom says you are. Is it true?”

“I don’t think your mom would lie about that, do you?” She wished things were different between her and Lonnie. She didn’t understand where she’d gone wrong or why Lonnie didn’t want to be around them. There were so many things she wanted to say but felt she couldn’t. Not if she wanted this tenuous meeting to continue. “Would you like to meet your grandpa?”

Marcy glanced over at the bed “is that him? Is he sick?”

“He’s getting better,” Verity nodded, her jaw hardening in determination.If she said it enough times it’d come true. It just had to.

“Should I sing to him?” the little girl asked, “mom always sings to me when I don’t feel good.”

“I think he’d like that,” Verity stretched out her hand, smiling when Marcy slipped her little hand in hers. “Maybe your mom would like to sing with us?”

Lonnie nodded, blinking fast as her hand gripped her mother’s. Their voices were a little quivery as they sang a song they all knew well. One that Verity had sung many times to Lonnie to help her sleep better after waking up from frequent nightmares. 

When the song was over Verity leaned in close, whispering so that Marcy wouldn’t hear her. “When you’re ready you can tell me anything. I’m just glad you’re here.”

“Thanks,” Lonnie sniffed, leaning into her mom taking comfort from her even without saying a word.

Knights of Hope – Chapter 30 – Hero

Verity noticed as soon as they entered that something was up. Something that put a lot of the officers on edge. In her experience that meant an undercover op wasn’t going to plan. No doubt the captain was furious which further increased everyone’s anxiety. Every fiber in her being told her it had to do with her son’s case she stepped in front of an officer whose head was down as if trying to duck, “ what’s going on here?”

The officer she attempted to stop stepped to the side, just stomach knocking over a pile of folders sitting in a desk. Grumbling beneath his breath he stooped to pick up the scattered documents. “The captain’s in a foul mood and taking it out on the rest of us. It’s not my fault the young hot shot detective is going off script.” 

Hastily she handed him the documents she had received having heard enough to confirm her growing suspicions. Loud voices were coming from an office she could see was the captain’s and from the waving of arms and shaking of heads she could see from the partially open blinds the captain was in a heated discussion with someone. 

Jerking her head in the direction of the office she took off in that direction knowing Kobi would follow her. As she got closer she was able to make out snatches of the conversation going on inside. 

“What the hell does he think he’s doing?”

“He’s doing what he thinks he has…”

“Bull shit. He’s playing hero…”

“He took an opportunity to get the boy out…what do you think he should have done?”

“Wait for backup…”

“He knows what he’s doing…”

“He’s going to get them killed is what he’s going to do. The press is going to have a field day with this. We were so close to shutting down this so-called purist movement.”

Stopping outside the office door Kobi whispered “do you think they’re talking about Trebor?”

Putting a hand on the doorknob, twisting it in her hand “only one way to find out.” She didn’t need to see the faces of the officers behind her to know they were all apprehensive at her bold move to enter the captain’s office without advance notice. Protocol be damned. 

The two officers looked up with a jerk as Verity led the way inside. “What do you think you’re doing? Get out!” The captain stabbed the air with his index finger.

A slight smirk played across her face, an eyebrow rising “I’m not leaving until I get some answers.” To emphasize her point she crossed the room and took a seat in one of the empty chairs in front of the captain’s desk. Crossing her legs as if she didn’t have a care in the world and all the time to spare. 

After a slight hesitation Kobi followed her, taking the other empty chair. 

A deep growl of impotent fury filled the room as the Captain’s eyes raked them with hot coals. Sliding his chair out from beneath his desk he snapped “get a report on that idiot detective of your.” 

Verity watched as the other officer shrugged and hastened to leave the room. From his stripes she knew he was a sergeant. 

The captain, none too pleased to be caught unawares, steepled his hands in front of him, elbows resting on the desk. “Now what can I do for you?”

“You can tell us what’s being done to find my son,” her eyes narrowed slightly “and don’t tell me the tired old line we’re doing everything we can BS. I spent enough time on the force not to be nullified by that hollow speech.”

Sitting back, chair squeaking in protest. He glared across the smooth surface of his desk void of any evidence of work being done. “Are you implying we’re not doing everything possible to get your son back?”

Kobi held his breath. He didn’t like the way the man was looking at Verity. His own pulse leaped into his throat, pounding loudly in his ears. His eyes slid towards Verity. She appeared to be calm, patiently waiting. 

“We need answers,” her voice was clear, concise “not the cock and bull you’re dishing out to the local media. I want my son home.”

“We all want that,” he crossed his arms in front of his chest, breaking eye contact to pull out a notepad from his desk. 

“That’s why I’m here,” Verity moved forward, perching on the edge of her seat. “We’re not leaving until I know you’re not keeping my son in peril to break an even bigger case. I know how nice it’d look to have your name in the headlines as the guy who broke up the purist movement.” 

“I don’t like what you’re insinuating,” his voice was clipped with forced politeness but underneath was a cold, hard fury.

Kobi watched a muscle tic in the older man’s cheek. He was doing exactly what Verity was accusing him of. His need to break the case outweighed the safety of the victim. Kobi glanced sideways at Verity wondering what her game plan was.

“It’d be a pity if your claim to glory was spoiled by the death of my son.” Leaning forward her eyes intense, “could you imagine the field day the reporter would have?” Shaking her head she sat back, one foot waving in the air “I’d only be too happy to oblige them with an interview…”

Growling the captain’s face turned crimson “I resent your accusations. My department has been doing all they can to recover your son.”

Smirking a little she was more sure than ever that she had pegged him right as a glory hound. “What is being done to find my son?”

Before he could answer the door burst open and a young rookie cop motioned for them to follow “all hell’s breaking loose.”

***

“Stop the car,” Brayling shouted as they passed an old run down warehouse with signs in several windows advertising space for rent. “That’s him. That’s Trebor,” he frantically pulled at his seatbelt, releasing it to bolt from the car before they even had a chance to come to a stop.

“Braylin,” Tate shouted trying to grab him before he jumped from the moving car. It took only a few seconds to release his seatbelt and follow his son from the moving car. Fright lent him speed as he dove for his son dragging him from the busy street.

“Let me go,” he cried, struggling to free himself.

“It isn’t him,” Tate tried to reason with him, positive he wanted to find Trebor so much that his mind was playing tricks on him. 

“No,” he shoved Tate from him. “I know what I saw. It’s Trebor. I’d know him anywhere.”

Before Tate could gather his legs beneath him Bray was gone, running into a group of people. It wasn’t until Garrett sprinted past him that he realized what was happening. In horror he watched as an older woman came from inside the warehouse, holding something in her hands. Something she was pointing at Braylin. “Gun,” he shouted before he even realized what it was. People began running and screaming all around him as a sound of thunder echoed down the busy street. 

Pushing his way through the stampeding crowd Tate came to an abrupt stop. Two bodies lay motionless on the cold, hard pavement. “Braylin,” Tate whimpered, falling to his knees to pull his son’s body into his arms. 

“Dad?” Bray mumbled, opening his eyes looking up into his father’s face. “I’m okay. I’m not hurt.”

“You’ve lost so much blood,” Tate said, eyes full of horor.

“It’s … I’m not hurt,” Braylin sat up, legs penned by the body on top of him. “It’s not my blood. I’m okay.” He wasn’t sure if his words were getting through but he didn’t have time to waste. Crawling out from beneath the body he rolled the man over, gasping at the gaping hole in the man’s side. He pressed his hand down hard into the wound trying to staunch the flow of blood.

Wally got to his feet, pulling his gun from the waist of his jeans before turning to see where he had shoved Trebor the moment Kara had started shooting. His shoulder hurt where one of her bullets had grazed him. He saw Trebor crawling towards the street instead of staying where he couldn’t be seen. Two strides he yanked Trebor to his feet, “I told you to stay hidden.”

“My dad…Kara shot him,” Trebor swayed a moment. “I’ve got to help him. Please.”

Nodding Wally half carried, half dragged Trebor towards the injured man. “How is he?” he asked tersley as his eyes roamed the now deserted street. 

“Not good,” Trebor said, ripping his dad’s shirt to make a bandage. “Keep putting pressure on the wound. We’ve got to stop the bleeding.”

Braylin nodded, sparing a quick glance at Trebor, thankful to hear his voice. “Dad, call for an ambulance.”

Still shaking Tate pulled his phone from his pocket, making the emergency call he did his best to tell them where they were and in the end Wally grabbed the phone from him giving terse instructions. 

Handing the phone back Wally said “you’ll be alright now. The ambulance will be here soon.” 

“Where are you going?” Tate demanded when the young undercover detective started to walk away.

“I’m going after Kara. I’m not letting her get away.” 

“Shouldn’t you at least wait for help,” Tate asked.

“If I wait she’s gone,” Wally said without stopping. He stopped at the door long enough to make sure his gun was ready then he ducked inside.

Tate could hear sirens in the distance. Help was on the way. He glanced down at his son, hands pressed into the sides of another man trying to save their life. Trebor was alive. He turned. Another young life was in trouble.

“Dad,” Braylin’s voice cut into his thoughts. “Don’t please. We…I … need you.”

Torn Tate hesitated, torn between staying with this son and doing what he thought he should do. It was the briefest of hesitations that lasted a second maybe two but seemed to last forever as the air was filled with the sound of rapid gun fire from inside the warehouse.

Knights of Hope – Chapter 29 – Just a Little Luck

Verity glanced up from the computer she’d been staring at for the past hour to see Kobi come in and sit down in front of the fireplace. “How is he?” she asked.

“About as well as can be expected I guess,” he sat down with a weary sigh, staring into the fireplace. “I wish there was something I could do. He just lies there. He refuses to eat or take the sedatives the doctor prescribed him. Tate sits with him, holding his hand telling it’s all going to be alright.” Looking up the past few days drawing lines of stress on his face “but will it? Will he ever be ok? All he wants is Trebor to come back but what if he doesn’t?”

Verity understood the worst thing about being a parent is watching your children suffer. “He’s stronger than you think.” She knew his deepest fear would be to lose Braylin to the world of alcohol again. Turning she switched the computer off with a sigh. After spending hours on the phone talking to the detective in charge of the investigation and getting nowhere she had tried finding something in all the propaganda on the internet about the Purist movement. She was a fairly decent hacker but even her skills weren’t enough to find something useful. Kara knew how to hide any trace of herself. Verity knew her well from cold hard experience but she found her once. She could find her again.

Every instinct inside Verity told her to keep on pushing, looking and she was going to uncover something. Her cop instincts told her to get out there, asking questions, searching for clues, and turn over every rock until she found something. Her mother’s instinct wanted her to tear apart anyone who dared hurt her baby.

“This is just as hard for you and Garrett as it is for us,” Kobi said, watching her. “It can’t be easy just sitting here doing nothing when your son is out there somewhere, hurt, scared, maybe even dead.”

Crossing the room, Verity sat beside Kobi on the couch. “Does it show that much?”

Nodding he moved to stand beside the fireplace, leaning against it. “I want to be out there knocking on doors. At least I’d feel like I was doing something…” stopping he looked towards the stairs where Garrett had just come down them “how is he?”

“Tate’s got him to agree to trying to eat something,” Garrett told him. “I’m going to make him a simple soup. Would anyone else like something while I’m there?”

Shaking his head, Kobi knew he should probably eat something but he didn’t think he could. He turned at the light touch of someone’s hand on his shoulder and found himself looking in the concerned face of Trebor’s mom. 

“You should eat something,” Verity said. “Then you and I are going down to the precinct and make ourselves a presence to be recognized. Maybe we’ll get some answers or,” she shrugged “we’ll get kicked out. One way or the other I’m going to try.”

Kobi grinned at her “sounds like a plan.”

“I thought you might,” she chuckled a little, “at least we’ll be doing something.”

***

Garrett gave Braylin a smile as he entered the room when he found Bray sitting up. “Still feel like eating?” he asked, setting the soup on the side table by the bed. He asked the question even though he had no intention of taking no for an answer. He knew Tate well enough to know he wouldn’t either. 

Giving the bowl a somewhat dubious look, Bray slowly nodded his head. “I’ll try,” he said without much enthusiasm for the task.

“That’s’ all we ask,” Tate said, giving Garrett a relieved, grateful look. He hadn’t been sure he’d have been able to spoon feed his son the way he had threatened to do. Reaching the bed he took one of the pillows and used it to help prop Braylin up so that he could eat. “You need to be strong and healthy for when Trebor comes home,” he told him, hoping he wasn’t undoing all their effort and plunging Braylin into the depths of depression.

At first Braylin felt his throat clench shut, giving him the sensation of choking even before having taken a single bite. The thought of Trebor alone and afraid god knows where struggling to survive brought forth fresh tears. “I should be out there…” he made an inarticulate sound before adding “looking for him.” His bottom lip quivered but beneath the vulnerability was something new, a determination to put forth effort into his words. He was going to look for Trebor even if it meant knocking on every door in the city.

Nodding Garrett smiled in understanding “after you eat we’ll go for a drive,” he said, his own eyes reflecting the same determination of purpose that filled Bray’s. “We’ll look for places where someone could be hiding Trebor.”

Braylin stared at Garrett a moment as if suspecting he was just trying to get him to eat. After a moment he nodded, his eyes alive with renewed hope. “You promise,” he asked, reaching for the bowl.

“I promise,” Garrett assured him, nodding when Brayling took the bowl and began to feed himself. 

Tate stood up, walked over to Garrett talking softly “is this a good idea? Aren’t you giving him false hope.”

“I can’t see where it’ll hurt anything,” he shrugged, crossing his arms. “He needs to feel like he’s doing something. Wouldn’t you if it were Kobi who was missing? I know for a fact that Verity and Kobi are going to the precinct to see if they can get some information. I don’t see why we can’t drive around. Who knows maybe we’ll get lucky and see something?”

“I guess,” Tate nodded although he didn’t sound convinced. “It would keep his mind occupied.”

“It would and I admit I need to do something myself. My son is out there with that woman. I can only imagine how he feels being near her again.” He’d give anything to be able to wrap his hands around her scrawny neck. She had terrorized him and his family all his life. It was time for it to end. Some people would call him callous, he knew but he didn’t want to understand why she did the awful things she did. He just wanted her gone.

He yelped a little in surprise when Tate touched his shoulder. “Trebor’s coming home,” Tate assured him “I know he will.”

Garrett nodded hoping Tate was right. His worry was what shape Trebor would be in when he was found. Would he be alive or found in some dumpster for them to find? He knew how Kara enjoyed having her handy work discovered.

***

Trebor huddled in a corner of his basement prison. Blood caked his face, one eye was swollen completely shut. His breathing was shallow as every breath caused a stabbing pain in his side. Broken ribs. Internal bleeding. His clinical brain knew the possibilities. He needed medical attention but he was unlikely to get it if he stayed here.

His body convulsed at the sound of piercing screams penetrating the clammy darkness of his prison. His sympathies went out to the poor soul. A part of him was grateful that it was someone else other than him. He knew he couldn’t hold out much longer. A person could only withstand so much before they’re willing to do whatever it took to make it stop. Every minute brought him that much closer to giving in. 

The pitiful screams grew in crescendo when someone opened his door letting in a bright stream of light that nearly blinded him. “Oh no, please…” he whimpered, pulling his legs tight against his chest “no more please…I..can’t…”

The words slipped from his cracked, swollen lips involuntarily. Anyone hearing them could hear how close he was to breaking. It was his silent prayer, a plea to whoever was out there to take pity on him. He just couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Shh,” a gentle hand helped him sit up. “If you want out of here you’re going to have to come with me. Now.”

For a moment the words didn’t make any sense. It was like he was hearing gibberish. Out. Leave. “What?” he murmured expressing what his befuddled brain was screaming at him.

“Do you trust me?” Wally asked, looking him straight in the eye. “IF you do, you’ll get up and come with me. We have to go now before they finish …” A shudder ran through him as yet another scream pierced the air around them. He didn’t like Ben but it’d take a colder heart than his to not be affected by what was happening to him. Kara was a sadistic woman who took pleasure in the pain of others. It was like she got off on it. 

“Ok,” Trebor nodded, taking a gamble on the only person here who might be able to help. Wally had given him the only ray of hope he had. That Braylin was counting on him to come home. That there was a surprise waiting for him. All he had to do was survive. Maybe just maybe someone had found his baby before it was too late or had Wally taken the risk and not thrown his baby away as he was told? He didn’t know, not for sure, it was just a feeling. Hope. Sometimes that was all a person needed to do the impossible.

“Good,” Wally pulled Trebor to his feet, wrapping an arm around his waist while threading Trebor’s arm across his shoulders. He was practically carrying him but it didn’t matter once they were outside, on the busy street Kara couldn’t do anything to them. Too many witnesses. At least that’s what he hoped would happen. With Kara you never knew if she’d do the logical thing or not.

“Why are you doing this? Helping me?’ Trebor asked panting from the exertion. Stabbing pains in his side made it harder to move. To breathe but he kept putting one foot in front of the other. Telling him he could do it over and over in his head reminding him of the story of the little engine that could.

“If we get out of here I’ll tell you,” Wally said, hoping that he hadn’t waited too long to come for Trebor. Hoped that Ben could last long enough to distract the others. All he needed was a little luck.

Knights of Hope – Chapter 28 – The Mole

“What are you doing here?” Kara demanded of the man invading her space. “Didn’t I tell you never to come here?”

“It’s important…” he looked down, frowning at the crackle of plastic followed each of his steps.

“More important than doing as you were told?” If he had been a smart man he would have heard the warning in her words and stepped quietly from the room instead of stepping further inside like a moth to a light. Annoyance flashed in her eyes “you could have been followed.”

“Pft,” he scoffed. “I’m better than that.”

“For your sake you had better be,” crossing her arms, glaring at him “or you’ll pay for that mistake with your life.”

Gulping his eyes took on a worried look but not enough to stop him from his objective. “No one followed me,” he repeated, almost adding that he’d stake his life on it. From her cold hard stare he knew he already had.

She raised a well manicured eyebrow “we shall see.” 

“Um,” her words raised the hairs on the back of his neck “you have a rat inside your organization.” At the last moment he decided against telling her there was an undercover cop working for her. 

“Oh?” Her eyes widened, feigning surprise “a rat other than you?” She valued loyalty and the man standing before her had none. Not to her. Not the wife and kids he claimed to love every time he left here to go to them. Not the job he’d given twenty years of his life to serve and protect. A little cash was it took for her to change his loyalties and she was sure all it would take was a threat to blow his house of cards down he’d sell her out to save his own ass.

A smile graced her lips, leaning forward she ran a finger over his pouty lying lips “how much will this information cost me?”

The wariness in his eyes faded to one of shrewdness as his greed outweighed his instincts. “Five grand,” he said, “surely knowing the name of the rat is worth that.” Now he could afford that luxurious boat he had his eye on. He and his son could finally take that long awaited fishing trip they’d been talking about since he was a freshman in high school six years ago.

“That’s a lot for a single name,” she wrapped a strand of hair around her finger the way she used to when she was younger and her hair was three times longer than it is now. “What makes you think I don’t already know who it is?”

Smirking a little as his confidence grew. “If you did, you wouldn’t have the rat guarding the cheese right now.”

Her eyes narrowed involuntarily as she took in the meaning of his words. Her silence seemed to bolster his confidence even more as he continued “I knew that would get your attention. I’m even more useful outside the bed than I am inside it.” 

She hissed like an angry cat when she felt his arms move to embrace her. She relished the shock in his eyes when the crack of a gun went off. His hands fell to his side as he staggered backwards, falling slowly to the floor. His breath gurgled in his throat as he tried desperately to talk as if he were asking her why. The question lingered in his eyes as if he still couldn’t believe what had happened.

“You never were that good in bed,” she said stepping over his still warm body “and neither was the information you provided.” She stuck head out the door “Wally I need you to clean up a mess for me.”

***

Wally stopped, groaning inwardly when he heard Kara call his name. He was on his way to check on Trebor. He didn’t trust Ben to have kept his hands to himself even though Kara had ordered him not to touch Trebor until she was ready to resume his torture herself. He followed her back into her private room. The first thing to greet him was the body of the officer he’d met at the hospital. Had he told Kara about him? Did she know he was undercover? 

“What was he doing here?” he asked, kicking at the body with his toes. “Guess he wasn’t much of a cop.”

Wiping her hands off on a wet wipe that she kept stored nearby in case she had to get her hands dirty. Her nose wrinkled in disgust “men like him rarely are good as they think they are. He found out the hard way. Is Ben downstairs guarding the boy?”

“He is,” he confirmed, pulling the plastic up and around the body. He silently shook his head at the man who had a good fifteen years of on the job experience more than him and yet he didn’t realize he was stepping into a trap. Didn’t hear the crackle of plastic beneath his feet as he stepped into the room. Everyone around here knew that Kara laid out the plastic when she expected to get rid of someone and she anticipated doing it herself.

Wally didn’t even know the guy’s name. All he knew was he didn’t like the guy. There was something about how hostile he became when they were talking to Bray at the hospital. He had been too willing to accuse Braylin of having set up Trebor. Had he told Kara about the mole in her operation? Did she know it was him? Wally didn’t think so since she hadn’t added him to her floor decoration for someone else to clean up.

“How well do you know Ben?” she asked him as she watched him wrap up the officer’s dead body in plastic.

Shrugging he kept his nose down concentrating on his work, trying to preserve whatever if any forensic evidence on the body for when it was found later. Kara enjoyed knowing her kills were found. She never tried to hide them. She liked knowing their families were suffering.

“I met Ben about a year ago. Playing hockey. He’s the one who suggested I try out for the team. Didn’t really think I’d make it. Best decision I ever made. Can’t say I like being his roommate though. He’s a slob.” He often wondered how Ben managed to get so many women to come home with him and into his room.

Poking the now carefully shrouded body with her pointy toed shoes Kara said “did you know this piece of trash said we had a mole? That it was someone I trusted.”

Wally’s heart leaped into his throat. His palms were clammy as sweat rolled down his back. “Did he say who it was?” His acting lessons in high school were paying off now. He couldn’t even hear the anxiety he felt in his voice. He moved to hoist the body onto his shoulder to carry out to the car to dump in some dumpster somewhere.

Sighing she examined her manicured fingernails “he was gloating too much to be specific.” Her bottom lip curled “but I know who it is. He said enough for me to know before I ended his insufferable prattle. Ben is the only one on guard duty, isn’t he?”

Wally met her gaze for a moment and he could see the murderous gleam within it. It sent a cold shiver down his spine “uh yeah,” he confirmed. “He begged me for my shift this morning.” He knew Ben had wanted to taunt Trebor through the door but he couldn’t think of a reason not to let him take his place. It didn’t escape his notice that if he hadn’t traded shifts Ben would be the one disposing of the body and he’d be the one Kara suspected as the mole. It just might have sealed Ben’s fate and saved Wally’s life.

“When you’re finished taking out the trash report back to me,” she said, reaching for the doorknob. She stopped just before opening it though to glance over her shoulder at him “you’re not hiding anything from me are you? You are one of my favorite pets. I’d hate to have to put you down.”

He felt sick to his stomach being referred to as a pet but he had a role to play and play it he would until the end. Smirking a little he chuckled “who else is going to pay me to rid the world of scum like this?”

“Good boy,” she patted the top of his head like he was a dog. “I knew I could count on you. Now hurry back as there might be more trash for you to clean up later.”

Knights of Hope – Chapter 27 – Numb

Trebor trembled on the floor where he had curled himself into a ball, whimpering softly. His baby was gone. Dead. Thrown away like yesterday’s trash. Images of the past filled his mind. He was once more he was that little two year old crying for his mommy and daddy wondering why they didn’t come for him. Now he wanted to feel Braylin’s strong arms embracing him, telling him it was only a dream. Only a dream…

A fresh wail escaped his lips, filling the darkness around him like a wounded animal. Shivering from the damp, cold basement he wished for death to come for him. He didn’t want to live knowing he was helpless to save his baby. 

Light from the single, yellow bulb in the ceiling cast an eerie glow around him. Trebor knew beyond the closed, locked door Ben guarded the door, making sure he couldn’t escape, listening to his distress with a stone heart. Shoving a hand into his mouth he tried to muffle the sounds of his sobs as his mind replayed the only moments he’d spent with his baby before Wally took them away.

The door creaked open. From where he lay Trebor could only see two pairs of legs. “Get up,” came the voice from the past, from his worst nightmares. 

He just laid there too weak with grief to move. Rough hands hauled him to his feet. He didn’t need to see their face to know it was Ben. He could smell the distinctive soap everyone on the hockey team used after practice, it sent a pang of loss and yearning for Braylin.

“You’re going to make a video for me,” Kara informed him. “All you have to do is read it. Then all this will be over and you can join your son in the hereafter.”

Instinctively Trebor shrank from her, shaking his “no.”

Smirking a little when he flinched from the hand she placed on his cheek. It was soft, almost gentle. “You want the pain to stop don’t you? This is the only way it will.” The sound of her other hand slapping his face filled the room

Tears stung his eyes as heat rose from his assaulted cheek. “No,” he repeated his voice rising “I’d rather die than be the spokesman for your purist ideology.”

“I think you will,” her eyes smolder with a burning fiery rage fueled by her hate. “Die that is. I’ll make sure your body will be found where your pink haired boyfriend will find it. Thrown away like the trash you are.”

Her venomous words stung worse than her slap had. “Why do you hate me so much?” He wasn’t sure where the words came from except it’s something that had bothered him for years. Why hate a two year old for not loving her the way she wanted? 

Glaring at him, her face turning a deep crimson “you were born to them.” The words came out in a hiss spraying spit into his face “I tried to save you and all you did was cry for them.”

“I was two,” he wasn’t sure why it mattered and maybe it didn’t. It wouldn’t change anything. “I won’t help you.” He couldn’t do it. It would mean his baby would have died for nothing.

“We’ll see about that,” she nodded towards Ben who still held Trebor’s arms behind his back. 

Trebor gasped as Ben’s fist jabbed him in the small of his back and his foot connected to his side as he fell to the floor. Soon he lost track of how many times he was battered by Ben’s fists and feet. He didn’t care. He was numb. Floating in a sea of black…

***

Several hours later Wally knelt beside Trebor’s side. If he didn’t already know who it was he wouldn’t have recognized him. He let out a small choking sound of revulsion. Ben had done a horrifying job and he was shocked that anyone would have had the will to resist after such a beating. Leaning down he whispered in Trebor’s ear what he hoped would give the extra strength to continue to resist and not give in to Karia’s demands. 

Standing up Wally wiped his hands off on his pants leg, his face twisting in disgust. “What did you do? Beat him with a meat mallet?”

Chuckling Ben held up his hands inspecting the reddened knuckles and slight bruising. “I didn’t think he’d offer much resistance but I’ll get the job done. He’ll make the video. He’ll become the face of our movement. Get things back to the way things are supposed to be.”

Wally had heard it all before. How pregnancy was the right of every woman. How it was unnatural for a man to give birth ad nauseum. It did little good to explain the merits of the science behind the procedure. How it made it possible for childless couples the chance to have their own biological child. All the purists saw was a man giving birth and how that wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. Unnatural. Briefly he wondered what they’d do to him if they knew he was capable of having children. His own biological children. 

He and his partner had been planning to start their own family. It was the reason why he took this assignment. He wanted to stop this group before they started to bomb hospitals who offered to procedure. He wanted to stop them before they started to destroy more innocent lives. 

Wally forced himself to make the off hand jokes that were expected of him. Say the things Ben expected of him. Inside he cringed at the filth coming from his lips. He wanted nothing more than to end this now. To take himself and Trebor out of here and all of this. He could get them all for kidnapping and grievous bodily harm but the movement would gain more followers. They’d all become martyrs for the cause. He needed definitive proof that this was nothing more than a vendetta against one person and not a worthy cause. Even then he doubted he’d be entirely successful.

“Hey what’s up with  you?” Ben’s voice interrupted his thoughts “aren’t going soft are you?”

Alarm bells sounded inside his head as he looked into Ben’s shrewd gaze. Shrugging he shook his head rubbing his eyes “tired I guess. Been up all night.”

“You’d get more sleep if you gagged the cry baby,” Ben stated, casting a callous eye over Trebor sniffling in the corner.

“So you do sleep while on guard duty,” he insinuated, hoping to redirect Ben’s attention. “Maybe I should report you to Kara. With satisfaction he saw the flash of fear in Ben’s eyes. They both knew if he did, Ben would be in the same or worse shape then Trebor was. 

“It’s not like that piece of trash is going to escape,” he said with more bravado than confidence. 

“When did that ever matter to her?” Wally pointed out walking towards the door. .”I’m bored, let’s get breakfast and see what’s on the news.”

Ben hesitated a moment before following his friend from the basement room. He had a nagging feeling that he’d missed something. Shaking his head, he dismissed it. Wally was his friend. He was committed to the cause. He wasn’t about to get Wally into trouble just because something felt off at least not unless he had proof. 

***

Braylin wandered into the nursery. He and Trebor had decorated the room together. Their son should be asleep right now. Trebor would be standing by the crib looking down at him with so much love that his face would be glowing. It was so real to him that Bray found himself stepping forward to wrap an arm around Trebor’s waist to join him. He stumbled forward, falling to his knees whimpering loudly, the dream shattered leaving him inside his worst nightmare.

Most of his teammates had taken turns staying with him during the night. Worried about him. Helping him when the urge to drown himself in the only thing he knew would dull his pain. He was thankful they were there for him. Thankful that he hadn’t given in to the urge to stop at the liquor store on his way home from the hospital. He remembered he’d parked in front of one, sitting in his car shaking. Wanting, needing the temporary release one drink would give him. How he had the strength to not go in he could only attribute to Trebor. Thinking of him and how disappointed he’d be if he knew kept him from caving in. The thought of his helpless newborn son alone at the hospital with no name to keep him anonymous to anyone checking. 

Moaning he wished that someone was there to hold him now. His teammates are gone now. Some to their own homes and families. Others home to catch a few hours of sleep before practice. The sound of the front door opening and closing, muffled voices and footsteps coming up the stairs barely registered in his befuddled head. It wasn’t until a voice called out that he realized the danger he was in and he was sure the door had been locked. 

Crawling to the door, Bray leaned against it listening to the muffled voices on the other side of the wall. How did they get in here? He was positive he told John to lock the door when he left. He was sure he checked before he came up here. It took a moment before he could hear anything above the sound of his own heart beating rapidly in his chest. He knew those voices. With a trembling hand he twisted the knob he all but fell into the hall “Dad?”

Both men turned at the sound both rushing forward to gather their son into their arms. “Bray,” they repeated his name as if to reassure themselves that he was there. “We came as soon as we could.”

The memory of making the calls to his parents and Trebor’s came rushing to him. He didn’t know what was said or how he’d been able to get through them. He’d felt numb. Trebor was gone and his son … he’d told them his son was dead. They’d been horrified. There had been crying. He didn’t think it was him though. He just felt numb. Dead. He wanted a drink. 

The feel of his parents holding him. Knowing he wasn’t alone. The first sobs erupted from deep inside him like a volcano exploding. It felt as if he were choking as all his repressed emotions from the past twenty four hours were released at once. He couldn’t talk. He couldn’t breathe. All he was a mass of nerve endings and emotions. No longer was he numb. He just hurt.

Knights of Hope – Chapter 26 – Undercover

Arriving at the hospital, Braylin ran inside the emergency room. Groaning loudly at the sight of the long line in front of the lone nurse at the reception desk. Tapping his toes as he barely restrained his frustration as the couple in front of him aired their grievances at having to wait to see a doctor. It struck him as odd when it was his turn and it wasn’t Lana greeting him. “Can you tell if Trebor Bennett has checked in yet?”

Checking something on her computer in front of her she shook her head “are they a patient?”

“An ambulance was supposed to bring him in. He’s in labor,” the words tumbled from his lips. “He should be here already…”

“Not necessarily,” the woman gave him a sympathetic if harried smile “why don’t you have a seat and I’ll let you know when he has been admitted.”

Bray’s protest died on his lips as the man behind him pushed him aside anxious for attention. Taking a seat in the crowded waiting room Bray kept a silent vigil on the emergency room door. Several accident victims had been reeled in but not one pregnant person. Not one had Trebor’s distinctive red hair. 

An hour slowly ticked by. Bray couldn’t overcome the feeling that something terrible had happened. Dragging his eyes from the emergency room doors when someone called his name. The tone sounded irritated like they had been calling his name for some time. He looked towards the receptionist, his heart leaping in hope that she was going to tell him Trebor was here. That he was fine. Standing his chest painfully tight as he saw the grim pinched look on the woman’s face.

Approaching the desk Bray didn’t notice the uniformed officers until the nurse motioned towards them “these officers want to talk to you.”

Gulping the sour taste in his mouth “was there an accident?” He grabbed the nearby desk needing it’s support as the room spun around him. Had the ambulance been in an accident? Was Trebor hurt? 

“Is there somewhere a bit more private where we could talk?” the older officer asked.

“Well…there’s a room over there that’s used for meetings,” she pointed with her pen. 

One of the officers gently took Bray by the elbow, directing him towards the room.  

Once inside Bray sat down staring absently at the steaming cup of coffee one of the officers put in front of him. 

The older officer cleared his throat making sure he had Bray’s attention. “The ambulance dispatched to pick up Mr Bennett was stolen. The EMTs were found unconscious in the basement…” The man’s eyes narrowed watching Bray’s reaction to the information.

Blinking slowly Bray’s hand that had been wrapped around the coffee cup squeezed the paper cups squeezing the hot coffee out and over his hand and table top. “Where’s Trebor? Why would someone want to pretend to be paramedics?” His voice rising as he staggered to his feet “I have to go find him.”

“Sit down Mr McGavin,” the officer ordered, leaning against the door, arms crossed. 

Bristling at the man’s tone, Bray ignored him as he stomped towards the door. “No, I can’t just sit here doing nothing. Trebor could be hurt. He’s pregnant. He needs help.”

“We’re doing all we can to find him,” the other officer said, putting a hand on Bray’s shoulder, squeezing it firmly. “Have you or Mr Bennett had any threats made towards you? Strange phone calls?”

“No,” he shook his head frowning. “Well there are two new guys on the team that are always handing out Purist pamphlets and getting up in my face about how it’s unnatural for two men to have a baby. Trebor mentioned that the Purist movement was making coming into work difficult because of their protests.” He fell silent staring at his hand that was red and blistering from the spilled coffee. “You don’t think they had anything to do with this do you?”

The officers exchanged glances “we’re not at liberty to say.”

“But we’re looking into all angles,” the younger officer added, making his older partner frown with disapproval.

***

Braylin ran a shaky hand through his thick pink hair causing it to stand on end. “Where’s my husband?” The word slipped from his lips unconsciously. “I mean my boyfriend…I’m going to ask him…I was waiting for the right time.” The words tumbled from his lips in a torrent of regret and guilt. Why hadn’t he asked before? The question haunted him. 

The door to the meeting room opened and a pudgy faced man stuck his head inside, motioning for the officers to follow him. Without a word the officers got up and left Bray alone with only his troubled thoughts for company. 

Sitting as if frozen, Braylin barely moved when the door opened and the young officer from before entered clearing his throat to get Bray’s attention. When Bray finally looked up the young  officer said “Mr McGavin please come with me.”

Hope had Bray springing to his feet. A single thought racing through his mind, had they found Trebor? Was he hurt? What if they never find him? A small sound like a whimpering groan came out of his lips as he followed the officer towards a group of people who seemed to be focused on something. 

Getting closer Bray could see that everyone was looking at something small wrapped in a blanket. A tiny fist waved in the air as a nurse turned, smiling at Bray “meet your son.”

“My…my son?” he stammered, his eyes fell on the tiny baby in the nurses’ arms. He could feel his face twisting in a kaleidoscope of emotions “he’s alright? You found him?” Surely if they found his son then Trebor was nearby. His eyes scanned the area but all he saw was a sea of blue uniforms and unfamiliar faces.

“You can hold him,” the nurse offered “a doctor will be along in a moment to check him over but he seems to be perfectly healthy.”

Gently the nurse helped position his hands to support the baby’s head. His son. He was holding his son. Somehow he never realized the surge of love that seemed to thrum between him and this tiny baby. If anyone had told him the night of the benefit dinner that he was about to meet the man who would change his life forever he’d never have believed them. How could one night of fun have altered his life so much?

All too soon the nurse was reaching for his son to take him. “I’m sorry I have to take him now.”

“Can’t I just hold him a little longer?” He asked, holding the baby against his chest, “Just a little longer, please.” It was like she was taking his last link to Trebor away from him.

“I’m sorry but we need to check him over,” she explained. “You can come hold him again later.”

Reluctantly he let her take him from his arms. He let out a shaky breath, wiping his eyes on the back of his hands. “Where’s Trebor?” his eyes searched the faces trying to find one who could give him the answers he needed. “He isn’t here is he?” he whispered seeing the answer in their eyes.

***

Movement at the corner of his eye drew Bray’s attention. The older officer he’d met before was talking to someone who looked vaguely familiar, from where Bray stood it looked like the officer was trying to get him to leave. It had been the urgent hand waving that had drawn attention to them and a moment later Bray was charging across the room “what the hell are you doing here? What did you do to him?

Wrapping his hands around Bray’s wrists Wally tried to pry them loose from his shirt that held him pinned against the wall. “How should I know? Get your filthy hands off me.”

Bray growled banging Wally’s head against the wall “tell me what you did to him. I know you did something.”

Wally sagged against the wall staring into the wild half crazed eyes of the man pinning him against the wall. “You’re going to blow my cover then no one will find him.”

Bray heard the words but they didn’t make sense. “What?” he asked, blinking as if he found the entire situation beyond his grasp at the moment.

His momentary disorientation was enough for Wally to break loose from his hold and to grab Bray by the upper arm and drag him into the nearby empty meeting room. “Sit,” Wally pointed toward a chair across the room.

“Don’t do it,” The older officer said, following them into the room.

“It’s too late for that,” Wally ran a hand through his hair. “We’re on the same team. If he tells anyone and it gets back to Ben that I brought the baby here instead of dumping it in a dumpster somewhere I’m a dead man. The Purist leader is one crazy bitch.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Braylin demanded frowning at Wally.

Sitting across the table Wally sighed. Sometimes he hated his job. The things he had to do. The lies he had to tell. Sometimes he wondered if it was worth it. It had taken him six months to get as deep into the Purist movement. He couldn’t simply walk away now. He knew too much. Seen too much. “You have no reason to trust me but I’m asking you to listen.”

Bray grunted, scowling at him. “Why don’t you just tell me what’s going on and let me decide if I trust you or not.”

Glancing over his shoulder Wally jerked his chin at the officer “get out.”

“No way,” he protested leaning against the wall, arms crossed. “For all we know he could be a part of all this…”

“The hell I am,” Bray jumped to his feet, sending the chair toppling over.

“Sit down,” Wally urged without turning from the officer. The older officer was tense, his muscles bunching his shoulders as if he expected to be attacked. “I bet you’d like that…give you an excuse to hit him.”

“I don’t need an excuse to hit scum like that,” he snarled, his face a mask of disgust and contempt. Abruptly he turned and left the room banging the door shut behind him.

A moment later Wally opened the door, motioning towards someone and the older officer’s partner nodded and quickly went in pursuit. Stepping back into the room Wally closed the door behind him. “Sit down Bray no one thinks you’re involved. I know you’re not. I’ve been undercover for months. I’ve gotten close to the leader and she has a personal vendetta against Trebor.”

“She what?” Bray blinked that didn’t make sense. “Who would want to hurt Trebor that they’d kidnap him and use him as a front for the Purist movement?”

“Has he ever mentioned a woman by the name of Karia?” Wally asked.

“Oh no,” he closed his eyes, groaning. “That’s his Aunt. She kidnapped him when he was two….She threw him away in a trashcan.” His eyes lifted meeting Wally’s, swallowing hard “he still has nightmares.”

Nodding Wally sighed “she’s an evil bitch.” If it was the last thing he did he was going to stop her, this movement and bring Trebor home. 

“Trebor’s never done anything to her. Why is she doing this to her?” Bray asked, swallowing over the helplessness he felt.

“It doesn’t matter. Sometimes all it takes is being in the wrong place and wrong time. For Trebor he had the misfortune to be born and be the object of her obsession and hatred.” He’d read the files and knew she was a powder keg of unpredictability. 

“Did you see him? Trebor I mean. Is he alright?” 

“I saw him,” Wally reached across the table, giving Bray’s hand a firm squeeze. “He’s alive. Scared but alive.” He snapped his mouth shut to keep from telling him more. How Trebor had begged for the baby’s life when Karia had told him to dispose of it. That he thought Trebor was shattered and broken. 

“Does he know our son’s alive?” Bray asked “if he knew it’d give him the strength to get through all this.”

Shaking his head Wally “he thinks the baby’s dead.”

‘Then you can tell him. Give him hope…” He knew Trebor would be able to survive this if he knew. Had some hope.

“I can’t,” she shook his head “if he knew he wouldn’t react the way Karia expects him. It could put him in even more danger than he already is.”

“I hadn’t thought of that,” he admitted, “what can I do to help?”

“For now I need to play the part of the grieving father…”

“What?” he gasped, not comprehending.

“The baby’s supposed to be dead. The news is going to say an infant was found in a garbage bag thrown in a dumpster. We need you to play your part. Trebor’s life could depend on it.”

“I’ll do what needs to be done to bring Trebor home,” he said even though he dreaded having to lie to his family and Trebor’s and say their son was gone.

Knights of Hope – Chapter 25 – Recruits

“Do I have to go?” Trebor asked, his eyes never leaving the flames in the fireplace. 

“Of course you do,” Braylin chuckled, glancing over his shoulder from where he sat reviewing his stats on the computer. “I thought you wanted to go.”

Trebor didn’t turn to meet Bray’s gaze, he could feel his confusion without needing to see the worried frown on his face. “I did, I mean I do …”

“I hear a but somewhere in there,” Bray moved from the desk to the couch, putting an arm around Trebor’s shoulders. “Why don’t you want to go?”

Trebor stared into the flickering flames before answering. Leaning into Braylin he said “everyone will be staring at me…I’m fat and ugly.”

Chuckling softly Braylin lifted Trebor’s chin up, shaking his slightly “no you’re not. You’re beautiful. Glowing even. They’ll be staring because they’ll be in awe of your beauty.”

Trebor thunked him on the back of his head before struggling to his feet in his clumsy, ungainly way. “You’re the only one who thinks that. Everyone else thinks I’m ….” He paled a little remembering something he’d overheard recently and shivered.

Snatching Trebor’s hand Braylin pulled him down into his lap, “tell me what’s wrong? Please. I know something’s wrong and it’s not about how you look.”

Averting his eyes Trebor struggled trying to break free of Braylin’s embrace. “Let me go. I’m too heavy.”

“You’re light as a feather,” Bray contradicted, holding him tighter, refusing to let him go. “I’m not letting go until  you tell me what’s wrong? It wasn’t that long ago you were excited about Joseph’s idea to throw you a babyshower. What’s changed?”

“Well,” he picked at a button on Bray’s shirt, tugging and pulling on it until it popped off. “Sorry,” Treboor murmured has his fingers started tugging on another button, unable to keep his hands still.

Winking at him Bray said “if you want to undress me all you have to do is ask. You don’t have to pull all my buttons off.”

“Oh,” a smile tugged at Trebor’s mouth as another button popped off. Forcing his hands into his lap Trebor took a deep breath “I heard them talking…”

Looking into his sad, troubled face Braylin asked “heard who talking?”

Trebor lifted his shoulders in a shrug before shaking his head “I don’t remember their names. They’re new though.” He turned his face away “they said it’s not natural for a man to give birth. That it’s against the natural laws…”

Bray felt the shiver that ran through Trebor’s body. “That’s their opinion,” his voice took on a gruff edge. He knew who Trebor was referring to, Wally and Ben. Two new recruits the coach had found. He’d noticed the way they had looked at him, like he was so much dirt beneath their feet. He had attributed to his reputation for drinking but now it took on a whole different meaning.

“They won’t be there,” Bray slowly ran his hands up Trebor’s arms to either side of his face. Holding Trebor’s face between his hands he could see how the callous words had hurt the man he loved. “They won’t be there,” he repeated, “it’s just going to be our friends, our family.”

“You’re sure?” he asked, his eyes lifting begging for reassurance. “Joseph said the whole team was going to be there. I don’t … I mean …” He bit his bottom lip. He’d always known there were still people who didn’t approve of two men being together. It was even worse when one of those men was able to have children. He’d seen them protesting at the hospital demanding they stop doing the alien procedure that made it possible to same sex couples to have their own biological children. Some of them even called them purists. As if the children born of these relationships were any less human than everyone else. He shivered as he wondered what they’d do if they knew the procedure could become hereditary, genetic, like it was for him. His great great grandfather William had been a direct alien experiment and many in his family had inherited the ability through him.

“I promise they won’t be there,” Braylin pulled Trebor close, just holding him tight.

***

A few weeks later Braylin was exiting the ice when the two new recruits blocked his path with identical smirks on their faces. “You didn’t come to the meet and greet. Our wives were looking forward to meeting you and your wife.”

Bray didn’t miss the way they emphasized wife and his hands convulsively gripped the hockey stick in his hands. “Trebor wasn’t feeling well,” his jaw clenched as a muscle in his cheek twitched uncontrollably. 

“Aww that’s too bad,” Ben feigned condolences while his eyes twinkled “Maybe the little wifey poo should let the real women get pregnant.”

Bray hissed a little at the intolerant words “that’s not up to you to say.” He regretted the words even before they finished coming out of his mouth. 

“We think it is,” Wally grabbed Bray’s hockeystick, giving it a vicious tug. “You and your kind are abominations to the natural order of things.”

“My kind,” Bray repeated the words that made his stomach lurch. His hands gripped the stick refusing to let go. “What kind would that be?”

“Perverts,” Wally leaned in close, letting his fetid breath wash over Braylin’s face. “Women have babies. That’s the way it’s always been and always will be. You’re kind should be …”

“Bray,” John’s voice cut into the conversations cutting short Wally’s hateful words. Joining them John looked between the men “is everything alright?”

Raising an eyebrow Bray challenged “is it?”

Giving the hockey stick a jerk Wally said “no but it will be.” With a nod Ben stepped back allowing Bray to pass between them. 

Walking away John asked “what’s their deal?”

“I don’t know,” Bray said, frowning “where did the coach find them?”

Shrugging “the east coast I think.” Looking over his shoulder John added “they sure don’t like you.”

“I guess I’m an acquired taste,” Bray said flippantly even though the encounter had left him feeling sick to his stomach. Shaking his head trying to free it from the vague feeling that he’d been threatened “do me a favor and don’t mention this to Trebor. He has enough to handle right now with the pregnancy and all. He doesn’t need to worry about those two idiots.”

“If you say so,” John nodded his tone telling Bray that he had already moved on to something else. 

***

Walking from the locker room, his mind still on the earlier confrontation he didn’t hear his phone ringing. When he did realize it he fumbled to pull it from his pocket and in the process dropped his keys onto the sidewalk. “Hello” he stammered, heart pounding so loud in his ears that he almost didn’t hear the soft voice saying his name in his ear.

Recognizing the familiar voice “Trebor? What’s wrong?”

“I .. I think it’s time…Oh no…”

Bray pressed the phone to his ear trying to hear something to tell him what’s happening on the other end. “Treb,” he almost shouted into the phone “come on answer babe.”

“Are you almost home?” He sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

Scanning the ground for his keys “I’m still at the arena.” They both knew that it would take him at least twenty minutes to get across town if traffic was light and he met the lights just right otherwise it could be longer.

There was a deafening silence before Trebor said “my water broke.”

“Have you called the doctor yet?” Bray asked, still searching the ground for his keys.

“No I…” he panted through a contraction “I was hoping you’d be home…”

“Listen to me babe,” he turned in a circle scanning the sidewalk in all directions and was rewarded with a flash of sunlight on something shiny he hoped was his keychain. “I want you to call the doctor and tell him you’re on your way to the hospital. Then call for an ambulance…”

“But we can’t can’t afford that,” Trebor protested, cutting him off.

“What we can’t afford is you going into labor and having that baby by yourself,” Bray asserted, snatching up his keys and sprinting to his car across the parking lot. 

There was a pause while Trebor mulled over what he’d said “alright.” 

“Good,” Bray smiled. “Keep me on hold while you do that.” Trebor had become quite clingy during the pregnancy and Bray knew he had a difficult time being left alone. Most of the time Eli and Lana would come stay with him or Bray would take him to their place. But they were out of town visiting Lana’s parents, having just become new parents themselves. 

He had just gotten the keys into the ignition when Trebor came back on the line. “The doctor said he’ll meet me at the hospital.”

“Good. That’s good.” he turned the key “don’t wait for me. Just go to the hospital when the ambulance arrives. I’ll meet you there. Okay?”

“Okay,” he voice sounded small and a little bit afraid.

“It’s going to be alright,” he said looking in the rearview mirror “I love you babe.”

“Love you too,” Trebor said, sounding more like himself “we’re about to become parents.”

“I know,” he grinned. “I can’t wait to meet the little guy.”

“It could be a girl,” Trebor said who rather hoped it would be. “I think the ambulance is here. See you at the hospital.”

“Yeah see you,” he said, putting his phone in the seat beside him as he turned in the direction of the hospital all thoughts of Wally and Ben gone from his mind.

Knights of Hope – Chapter 24 – Jumping to Conclusions

Glancing at the time Trebor sighed, it felt like forever since Braylin had called confirming he was on his way home. Six o’clock. Only an hour to go. Getting up, Trebor went to check dinner. Braylin’s favorite, it had to be perfect.

The aroma made his mouth water. Perfect. Trebor set the table with the china his mom had given them as a housewarming gift. Stepping back he surveyed the effect. After a moment he added candles. A few red roses from the bouquet Braylin had sent him. Nodding in approval Trebor felt a thrill surge through him.

Tonight they’d finally be together after being separated for over two months. Everything had to be perfect. Trebor had planned every last detail down to the scented candles in the bedroom for later that evening. His eyes strayed to the time. Five more minutes. He made his final checks. Satisfied, he went to the living room to wait for Braylin’s arrival. Time ticked slowly past six o’clock. At ten minutes past he anxiously peeked through the curtains wondering what was keeping Braylin. 

Thirty minutes later Trebor pulled out his phone thinking maybe he had missed a call or text. Nothing. Checking on the meal that had been slowly dehydrating itself the longer it sat warming. He tried to push aside thoughts of what might have happened to keep Braylin from calling or coming home. Had there been an accident? A flat tire? Maybe he stopped to pick up flowers and he’d mugged? Should he call the area hospitals?

At seven o’clock Trebor blew out the candles. The burnt wicks and lingering smoke are a silent testimony of what tonight had meant to be and wasn’t. Pulling out his phone he sent a text “Bray where are you?”

Eight o’clock Trebor turned the heat off the stove no longer interested in keeping his ruined meal warm. Closing his eyes he turned from the pots and pans on the stove as tears rolled down his cheeks. Where was he? It was a question on repeat inside his head. Glancing at his phone, he double checked his settings but everything seemed to be working as it should be taking away the last excuse as to why Bray hadn’t called him.

Nine o’clock Trebor switched off the romantic music that had been playing in the background, keeping him company. Sitting on the couch, pulling his knees into his chest mumbling to himself “why hasn’t he called? Where is he? Did someone somehow find out about the baby and tell him? Was he so against having a baby now that he wasn’t ever coming home?”

Ten o’clock the only sound in the room as Mr. McFluffers purrs as Trebor absently stroked the kitten’s fur. The only light in the room was from the street light outside the front window. “He’s not coming home,” Trebor murmured in a flat defeated tone. His worst nightmare come true.

Eleven o’clock Trebor moved from the couch, stiff from sitting too long in one position. Climbing the stairs, his phone forgotten on the table. Opening the door to the room he’d already decided would be the baby’s room, his face twisting with emotions.

Midnight the front door opened. A hand reached inside for the light switch. “I’m home,” a pink haired male called into the silence of the house. “I thought for sure he’d have waited up for me,” he murmured, shoulders sagging with disappointment as he lugged in his bags and hockey equipment.

Entering the living room he found Trebor’s phone. “That explains it. He didn’t get my message.” Walking into the kitchen to get a drink Bray frowned at the unusual mess Trebor had left. Chugging down the water he spied the set table, the candles and flowers. “Shit,” he mumbled, kicking himself for not calling sooner. 

Climbing the stairs Braylin found the door to the spare bedroom ajar. Deciding to investigate, Braylin switched the light on to find Trebor curled up on the floor. “Aww honey,” he knelt down beside Trebor. “I’m so sorry. I should have called. I didn’t think.”

***

Trebor woke up warm and comfortable, Braylin was moving softly beside him. At first his happiness overrode his irritation. He wanted to hug and kiss the man beside him. Then the crushing disappointment and worry from the night before enveloped him like an avalanche blotting out any other emotion he had.

Tossing the blankets aside he found Braylin had taken his shirt and shoes off, they were tossed haphazardly on the floor. Glaring at the man in the bed he wanted nothing more than to push him onto the floor with all the other junk scattered around. Grumbling to himself Trebor picked up the discarded clothing, his and Brays and dropped them into the hamper. 

Deciding that he needed a long, hot relaxing shower Trebor slammed the bathroom door behind him, cringing a little at the sight of the scattered rose petals and scented candles strewn around the room. Remnants from the ruined romantic evening the night before. His heart ached in his chest as he lowered himself to the floor to methodically gather all the petals on the floor to discard them. So absorbed in his task he didn’t notice when the door opened behind him.

“Hey,” Braylin’s voice sounded loud in the small room.

Jumping a little Trebor’s head jerked upward only to look away after glancing at the sparsely dressed male behind him.

Stooping Braylin started to help pick up the petals. He rubbed a few of them between his fingers, remorse settling into his features “I’m sorry…”

“You didn’t call,” Trebor snapped accusingly, cutting him off.

“I did,” he protested.

“No,” Trebor shook his head adamantly. “I checked my phone and rechecked it. You didn’t call.” Hugging himself tightly aware of his bare chest and stomach, worried that Bray might notice if he hadn’t noticed the night before … “I had it all planned.”

“Hey we can still have a special day,” Braylin soothed. “Run the bath and I’ll join you.”

“No,” Trebor tossed the petals in Bray’s face “it’s too late for that.”

“It’s never too late,” his fingers lightly touched Trebor’s upper arms.

Jerking from Bray’s touch Trebor demanded “where were you? I called. You didn’t answer.” Hugging himself he clumsily got to his feet. “I thought you were hurt or something.”

“I’m sorry,” Braylin cried “what more do you want me to say?”

“How about giving me an explanation?”

Leaning against the door, Braylin crossed his arms “you don’t trust me. You think I was out partying with the guys. Drinking.”

“What,” Trebor gasped, eyes round with shock. “I never said that. I know you wouldn’t.”

“Yeah whatever,” Braylin muttered, turning and fleeing the room.

Trebor watched him go. They’d never fought before. Not like this. It frightened him the way Braylin jumped to the conclusion he thought he was drinking again. That was the furthest thing from his mind. A part of him wanted to go after him and beg him for forgiveness. He didn’t know what he did to upset him other than admitting he was upset for not being called. Catching his reflection in the mirror he knew part of his reaction was due to his guilt for not telling Bray about the baby. How could he tell him now when everything was a mess?

***

Braylin threw on some clothes, grabbing his shoes he skipped down the stairs and out the front door. He needed air. He jogged down the street chastising himself for getting so upset. Trebor had never even hinted that he thought he’d been out drinking. Why had he brought it up? He knew Trebor trusted him. He appreciated that trust; especially when he went out to celebrate with the team. To pass up the drink he still sometimes craved and wished he could have.

He’d been looking forward to coming home for weeks but then he’d gotten that voice message. The impersonal voice saying his test results were ready and to call the Boroughburg Teaching Hospital. What test results? It had to have been a wrong number. That’s what he thought until he called only to be told they couldn’t discuss the results with anyone other than Mr Trebor Bennett. Was Treb sick? He kept expecting Trebor to call and tell him. But each call was as superficial as the last. Hi. How are you? I miss you. I love you. All the same. What was so bad that Trebor couldn’t tell him?

Braylin jogged past a floral shop. The multicolored flowers caught his eyes. Stopping in front he decided to go inside. He bought a large bouquet knowing it couldn’t make up for the night before or the fight this morning. 

Walking back towards his house Braylin wondered how he could apologize. Mostly he wondered if he should just ask Trebor what kind of tests he had? What were the results? He’d been stewing over those test results for weeks alternating between worry and anger. Getting off the plane it all came crashing down on him. He was suddenly scared of what he might find out. I hadn’t taken a lot of convincing to accept Joseph’s offer to go to his place to celebrate their successful season. He was there in body but his mind hadn’t stopped worrying about Trebor the whole night but he couldn’t bring himself to go home.

Walking into the house he heard the familiar sounds of clattering dishes as they were being washed. He walked towards the kitchen, clutching the flowers in his hands in front of him. Standing in the doorway he watched Trebor for a moment before saying “I am sorry,” his voice making his boyfriend jump and drop the pan he was holding onto the floor.

“Shit,” Trebor cried, clutching at his chest where his heart was pounding like a sledgehammer. “You scared me.”

“I seem to have that effect on you lately,” Braylin said but his voice lacked his usual teasing tone.

Trebor looked at him, face softening a little “I’m sorry too. I had so many things planned…”

“We can start over,” Bray suggested, holding out the flowers to Trebor “please.”

Trebor’s lips twitched as his soapy hands reached for the flowers “for me?”

“Who else would they be for?” Braylin grinned, a ghost of his natural teasing manner returning. “I should have bought them last night instead of trying to hide.”

“Hide?” Trebor repeated, sounding confused. “From what?”

“I was afraid…” Bray stopped realizing he almost told him he knew about the tests.

Frowning Trebor picked up the fallen pan “of what?”

Sighing he knew he had to say it for Trebor to understand. “A few weeks ago I received a call from the hospital that was meant for you…” He looked away, unable to look into Trebor’s eyes “they said your test results were in…”

“Oh..” he absently dried his hands on his pants leg “I was going to tell you but it didn’t feel right telling you over the phone…”

“Are you sick?” he reached for Trebor’s hand “I can take a leave of absence. The team will understand. I’ll take care of you. No matter what.”

“I’m not sick…” he moved in closer to Braylin “I appreciate the offer though but you won’t need to take a leave of absence to take care of me. At least I don’t think you will unless…” He saw the worry in Bray’s eyes “it’s not horrible. It’s just … we’re not ready.” Sighing he tried to step back but Bray’s arms were holding him tight “I was scared of telling you that I ruined our plans.”

Frowning, Bray lifted Trebor’s chin up “what are you trying to tell me? What plans have you ruined?”

Taking a deep breath the words came tumbling out “I’m pregnant. We were going to wait until later. We have careers and we’re not ready and… and…” He couldn’t list all the reasons why they were going to wait. Bray knew them as well as he did. “I’m sorry.”

Lifting a finger, Braylin wiped away the tears “you have nothing to be sorry for.” Chuckling softly as the tension and fear melted from his body. “I’ve been so worried that you were dying or something. I couldn’t face coming home last night and have my fears confirmed. That’s why I was so late.” He pulled Trebor even closer “we’ll manage somehow. It may be sooner than we planned but it’s not the worst thing that could have happened.”

“I’ve been so worried you wouldn’t want the baby,” Trebor murmured against Bray’s shoulder. “You have such a demanding schedule and I know it’s going to be difficult with my changing rotations at the hospital.”

“We can do this,” Braylin assured him.

“Are you sure,” Trebor looked up at him seeking reassurance.

“Of course we can.” He smiled giving Trebor a soft kiss on the lips “it won’t be easy but I’m convinced we can do anything as long as we work together.”

Knights of Hope – Chapter 23 – Things Don’t Always Go According to Plan

“This is ridiculous,” Trebor complained as he followed Eli into the examination room.

“Then why’d you agree to it?” Eli demanded with a raised brow and a glint in his eyes.

“I agreed to get you to shut up about it,” he mumbled, taking a seat on the exam table. “There’s nothing wrong with me. I’m fine.”

“Who’s the doctor here?” Eli asked putting a hand on his friend’s shoulder to keep him sitting where he was and not bouncing up and leaving.

“I am,” he mumbled, his upper lip rising in a snarl as he tried to think of something else to add.

“Wrong,” Eli shook his head as his arms opened wide to encompass the room “I am. You are the patient.”

Scowling he jumped as Eli’s cold fingers touched his skin. “Your fingers are like icicles,” he shivered to emphasise his point.

“My fingers might be cold but you’re being a whiny baby,” Eli chuckled. “Now breathe for me. Deep breath and hold.”

An hour later Eli handed him a cup. In response to Trebor’s mute protest he pointed towards the bathroom. “You know what to do.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he moaned, snatching the cup from Eli’s hand. “You’re just doing this because you can’t find anything wrong with me. You’ve had your fun,” he shoved the cup and test back at Eli “I’m not doing it.”

“It’s procedure,” Eli persisted “and you know it. You’ve given the test to hundreds of others who’ve presented with symptoms same as yours.”

“And what are my symptoms,” he challenged, turning from the door. He disliked this helpless feeling of being a patient. He much preferred being the one with the answers.

Eli lifted a hand up, his fingers ticking off things on a list “irritability, mood swings, forgetfulness, flu-like symptoms without having the flu…” Giving Trebor a triumphant grin as he saw the flash of acknowledgement in his friend’s eyes “do I need to go on?”

“It’s not possible,” Trebor mumbled, a look of wonder softening his face as he took the test and walked into the bathroom on wobbly legs. His stomach rumbled uneasily, swallowing hard as he resisted the urge to throw up. How was this possible? His residency wasn’t even finished. He couldn’t have a baby now and what about Braylin? The only time kids had ever been brought up in conversation Braylin hadn’t been keen on the idea. 

A soft knock on the door jerked him back to reality. Coming out he handed Eli the sample. As his hand released the sample he had a feeling that his life was about to change irrevocably. Forcing a smile to his face he said “you’re going to owe me big time when this comes back negative.”

“It’s not the end of the world,” Eli assured him, his eyes serious and warm with understanding. “People have been having babies for years now.”

“Not while they’re still doing their medical residency,” he snapped. He was already behind and if he had to take maternity leave he’d be lucky to retain his position at the hospital. 

“Hey don’t take it out on me. I didn’t do it to ya,” Eli sighed understanding why his friend was snapping at him. He’d feel the same way if it were him in his place. Not a likely scenario in his case but if Lana were to get pregnant…. “I’ll let you know what the results are as soon as I have them.” Shaking his head he added “I’d love to be a fly on the wall when you tell Bray though.”

“He’s only going to find out if it’s positive,” Trebor said.

“You and I both know it will be,” Eli persisted, laying aside all his jokes. “You and Bray will make this work. I know it.”

Trebor gave him a look like a man about to drown. All his doubts and insecurities rising to the top. “I wish I was as confident as you are,” he moved towards the door. “I know you have more patients to see. But you’ll call me as soon as you hear from the lab.”

Trebor could barely feel his feet as he walked towards the exit. He waved briefly at Lana at the nurses station on his way out. His mind, light years ahead. What was he going to tell Bray? Would he be happy? 

***

Later that day Eli called Trebor to deliver the results to his tests. His chipper voice rang loud inside Trebor’s ears while the phone shook against his ear. His life as he knew it was over. He sank to the floor pulling his knees into his chest. He’d seen more than one resident quit because of the rigorous demands on their time and body that becoming a doctor had on someone. It was even worse when you added a baby into the mix.

He now had to inform the hospital about his pregnancy. There would be restrictions he’d have to follow. Under normal conditions it wouldn’t be that bad but ever since the altercation between him and Doctor Brackett he felt he had to prove himself that much more or that he had a bullseye painted on his back. The director of emergency medicine didn’t like him and this would be just one more thing against him. He had four months left to his rotation in the ER before he could even hope to transfer to surgery and now with the pregnancy he may not even be able to do that.

Could he keep his pregnancy a secret for that long? Shaking his head he knew that won’t even be a possibility his name was on the lab work. Not to mention if Eli could guess he was pregnant than everyone else could too. He had been an emotional wreck for weeks now. It was just going to get worse as the pregnancy progressed.

Running a hand through his hair mumbling to himself. Mr. McFluffers joined him purring loudly. Taking the small kitten into his arms, snuggling it close to his face “if hiding it is out of the question, what do I do?” he asked the tiny kitten knowing there was no real answer. At least not one he liked.

The sound of his phone was loud and jarring in the silence. Trebor forced himself to reach for it with the intention of telling whoever it was he’d call them back later. He wasn’t in the mood to pretend to be chipper. “Hello,” he snapped at whoever was interrupting his sulk.

“Hey babe,” Bray said into his ear, sounding happy that couldn’t help but bring a soft smile to Trebor’s lips. “What’s wrong?”

“What makes you think anything’s wrong?” he said, trying to evade the question which only made him feel guilty. Taking a deep breath he tried again “nothing’s wrong.”

“Um…okay,” Bray’s voice held several unasked questions of a person not entirely convinced that everything was fine. 

“I can’t wait for you to come home,” Trebor added “I miss you and I…”

“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” Bray’s voice cut him off before he could say more. “I won’t be able to come home this weekend.”

“What! Why?” Trebor cried as panic made his voice into a shrill squeak. 

“If we win the next game,” Bray explained as if he couldn’t hear the panic in his boyfriend’s voice, “the coach wants to train here instead of going all the way back home. Then there’s the signing tour…”

Blinking back the tears stinging his eyes Trebor croaked out a single question “how long?”

Hearing the distress in his tone Braylin said “you knew this was a possibility. We discussed this…”

“I know but…” he pressed his lips together. There was no way he was telling Bray over the phone that he was pregnant.

“Before what?” he asked.

Gulping Trebor tried without much success to get a grip on his rampaging emotions. “Um … before I realized how much I was going to miss you.”

“I miss you too babe,” Brayin soothed. “I could probably make a quick flight home before the tour begins.” Sounding confident that the win was in the bag.

Trebor could hear it in Bray’s voice that he really didn’t want to make a special trip home. He knew Braylin would do it if he wanted him to. It would only cause friction when he wanted harmony to tell Bray about the baby. It was going to be hard enough to tell him much less making him make an unnecessary trip home. “No it’s okay. I’ll be fine.”  He heard the words. Heard the false conviction in the lie when all he wanted to do was to tell him to come home. Clearing his throat before a quiver told the lie “you better win.”

“Don’t worry we will,” he chuckled into the phone. “I’ve got to go now. Love you.”

“Love you too,” Trebor said, biting his bottom lip to keep from telling Bray to hurry home.

***

“Cheer up,” Eli told him as he slapped the book he was reading closed. “He’ll be home soon enough.” 

“Yeah I know,” Trebor’s mouth twitched a little before resuming it’s customary worried frown.

“Then why so glum,” Eli asked, watching his friend.

Shrugging Trebor moved off waving towards Lana who was walking past, her stomach protruding in her nurses uniform. He wondered when he’d be looking like that, unconsciously he put a hand to his stomach. Already there was a slight protruding that wasn’t there before. He was sure of it although Eli had told him it was just his imagination.

“You haven’t told him yet have you,” Eli asked coming alongside him.

Trebor’s eyes shot upwards then skittered away. Guilt making his stomach churn uncomfortably like he was about to throw up. “I didn’t want to tell Bray over the phone and he hasn’t been home…”

An eyebrow rose on Eli’s face “that’s an excuse…”

“Are you worried Bray won’t want the baby?” Lana’s voice made both of them jump a little when she joined them.

Turning Trebor gave her a little shrug, “we never really discussed it except to say baby’s could wait a while.”

She gave him a long considering glance like the kind his mother would give him when he attempted to skirt around the truth. It always made him squirm just as he was doing now. “Somehow I don’t believe you.” She took Trebor’s hand “Bray must have said something to make you so worried.”

Staring at her hand holding his, sighing he shook his head. “I’ve got rounds to get to,” he tried to walk away but her grip held firm.

“No, you don’t,” Eli said “we already did rounds this morning.”

“Tell us what’s bothering you,” Lana urged. 

Looking into her kind eyes he felt his resolve slipping. “It’s not that he’s against having kids. It’s just too soon. We hadn’t planned on having any yet. We’re both at the start of careers. Kids were supposed to come later.” He ran a shaky hand through his hair “this baby messes everything up.”

“Are you sure you’re not attributing your own feelings to him?” Lana asked. When Trebor only stared at her, his chin quivering a little she reached out, stroking his cheek “aw sweetie it’s going to be okay. Really it is.”

Eli moved next to her, wrapping an arm around her the other he rested on his stomach. “Believe me when we say we understand. We had the same discussions. We planned on being married first. Starting a family after my residency was done.” Shrugging, he looked up, eyes twinkling “what can I say? Things happen. Would I change it? Not in a million years. I’m sure Braylin will feel the same way.”

“Really?” Trebor sniffed.

“Yes really,” Lana moved from her fiance’s embrace to dry the silent tears running down Trebor’s cheeks. “Trust me. Things are going to be alright. Just tell him.”

“And,” Eli stepped forward “give him time to adjust to the news. You’ve had more time to adjust to the news than he has. Don’t be surprised if he doesn’t react the way you want him to initially.”

Nodding Trebor knew they meant well and it was something he needed to hear. All of it true; although it didn’t alleviate his worries. That wouldn’t happen until after he told Braylin and maybe not even then. “I’ll try,” he promised, knowing he’d put it off too long already. Brayling had been gone for two months already. “I’ll tell him as soon as he comes home.” 

“Don’t forget,” Eli said, poking him in the side. “You won’t be able to put it off for much longer. There’s going to come a time when you can’t hide the changes happening to your body.”

Slapping his hand away “gee thanks,” he mumbled. “Like I needed to be reminded of that.” He’d already noticed how his clothes don’t fit the way they should.